The above is a photograph I took recently of a barn on my uncle's property. Things have changed a bit there since my childhood. No longer is this barn surrounded by cows and horses grazing contentedly on green pastures. No longer are the lofts stuffed with hay or the tack room lined with saddles. But as some things in our lives change some part of them always stays the same. For me I will always love the aroma of hay and leather and they still have the power to transport me to another world full of adventures.
Some of my friends think I've been doing some changing myself although I don't really see it. I think the difference is I have always been this person on "the inside" and now have begun to live it "externally". I think you call that being more authentic. All those thoughts, ideas, "voices" I'm now letting out to make their way in the world and the I cant's are diminishing. One of the sources of letting those "voices" out has been through blogging. I am not writing much on this blog these days but this marks that blogosphere milestone of being my 100th post. The whole writing thing came after suggestions from a few friends and then my husband telling me to write it down so I did. I wrote my first post on August 26, 2008, which I guess means I have also just had an anniversary of sorts although at first it was a private journal only. This did help sort some thoughts, but then a few months later I read my first blog, yes I had never even read a blog before. Shortly after that I went public and began to read and write more. I have found this form of opening up and sharing with others therapeutic and probably the anonymity of it all made it easier. I now don't have so many voices in my head bouncing around and running into each other, arguing and debating life. I have gotten out this year and done many of the things I only thought of before and have so much yet to do. So to all of you out there in blogland I say thank you for inspiring and motivating me, for sharing your time and listening to my voice.